With so much talk about being unbothered these days and so many people portraying as nothing gets them down, I wanted to remind you that there's nothing wrong with being bothered sometimes.

Probably the only people that are never bothered by anything are actual psychopaths.

Assuming you're not a psychopath, and you're just someone who wants to spend less time being worried, offended, sad or anxious this is for you.

Focus on what you control

Wanting to feel some sense of agency and control is normal but, a constant need to be in charge often results in you assuming responsibility for things that aren't within your control or that you shouldn't be responsible for. If you're this type of person, you might find that whenever a situation is beyond your control it causes you to become fearful or anxious. Learning to focus your energy on things you can control will limit self-imposed and unnecessary stress.

Here's how to do it:

Take control: While you can't control everything, there are certain things that you can and should control. Things within your control include; your behaviour, the people you keep in your life, the effort you put into achieving your goals, how you deal with outcomes, and taking care of your physical and mental health. It might help if you write a list of things that are within your control so you can have a visual representation. On the other hand, if you often feel helpless, this list can also help you realise you have more control over things than you think.

Accountability: Remind yourself that you're only responsible for your feelings and the choices you make and not those of the people you care for. Accept any consequences that result from your actions and use past mistakes as a guide to making different choices.

Already have an account? Sign in.

The Art of Being Less Bothered